Uchiha Naruto
by Elric-Chan
Summary: Maybe kissing Naruto to show his fangirls that he was gay wasn't Sasuke's brightest idea. [sasunaru] COMPLETE!
1. Chapter 1

**Disclaimer: I do not own Uchiha Sasuke or Uzumaki Naruto.**

**Hmm... a lot of my ideas come from things I do or say wrong. I accidently said Uchiha Naruto one day, and then, since I'm a SasuNaru fangirl on parade, I thought it through and came up with this!**

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**_UCHIHA NARUTO_**

"Sasuke-"

"No."

"Sasuke, I-"

"Go away!"

"Oh, Sasuke-"

"Get lost!"

Burdened with thoughts of the numerous kunoichi who made it a pastime of stalking and pestering him, and tired of shouting himself hoarse, Sasuke turned tail and disappeared in a puff of smoke.

Free of the kunoichi, Sasuke heaved a sigh and sat down to think. With his brains and cleverness, it wouldn't be too difficult to devise a plan to get rid of his fangirls, or make them stop following him, at least.

Then an idea hit him. But he scowled at it. It was horrible.

Minutes later, Sasuke was hit with the sad realization that there was only one thing he could do: kiss a boy.

If the girls thought he was gay, then they would see that stalking him was pointless and was going to get them nowhere. They would still like him, of course, but hopefully, maybe they would be too repulsed by thinking of what he did with men that they would flat out leave him alone for good.

Sasuke rubbed his hands together. His plan was set. Kiss the first boy with girls in the vicinity that he ran into.

XXX

That boy happened to be Naruto. He was at Ichiraku, for ramen of course, and there were girls swarming the place. Sasuke scowled again as he peered around the corner of the shop. Why did it have to be Naruto? Why couldn't it have been Shikamaru, or Kiba or someone? Anyone else. But desperate times call for desperate measures, and Sasuke was what you could desperate at the moment.

Taking a tremendous breath, he strode up to Naruto, cleared his throat, made sure the girls were looking, and grabbed the kyuubi to give him one particularly hot kiss.

XXX

Now that Sasuke had fled the scene, leaving scandalized and tearful girls in his wake (not to mention a blushing, swooning yaoi fangirl in the corner and a very confused Naruto), our Uchiha was beginning to see the flaw in his plan.

If this was really to work, he would have to keep up the act. And it would have to be Naruto he made advances to, and no on else, otherwise he would not only have the title of "homosexual", but also "man whore".

Then, if he ever decided to call it off, he would probably never have a chance with anyone. Guys were out, and most girls wouldn't want him anymore.

His only hope would be to, in the end, turn gay.

Poor Sasuke.

He tramped back to his home, careful to be staelthy and stay out of sight. Words spreads fast in Konohagakure.

XXX

When a knock sounded at the door, Sasuke grumbled. He had no doubt in his mind that it was someone coming to ask about what had happened at Ichiraku.

He tentatively opened the door to see Kakashi standing there, his arms folded with an air of smugness.

"What?"

"I heard what you did, Sasuke."

"Well... good!"

"Good?"

"Yes, cause... I'm gay now!" Sasuke said, wildly inventing. "You got a problem with that?"

"No, I don't. I came to tell you something."

"Well?"

"Naruto says he loves you too, and he wants to be your boyfriend."

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**Yes, this is To Be Continued!**

**Ooh, I love me and my yaoi-ness!**

**Reviews will help my slowly deflating ego.**


	2. Chapter 2

**Disclaimer: I do not own Naruto. It is the sad truth.**

**Feh... I was too lazy to type another chapter. And then I saw that 37 people had this on their alert list and I decided to finally update.**

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Kakashi's words rang like a incessant bell in Sasuke's head. Naruto really wanted to be his... _boyfriend._

It wasn't something Sasuke had planned.

He had thought that at best, the girls would remember and Naruto would let it go, and at worst, Naruto would just start avoiding him completely (an added bonus, in Sasuke's opinion). But never had he thought that Naruto would enjoy the kiss, let alone want more.

What could he do?

He had no other choice. His only option now was to date Naruto.

XXX

He greeted the overly passionate kyuubi with a smile the next day, only to be jumped upon and made out with in public. Much to Sasuke's dismay, many of his former fangirls now seemed to think that Sasuke and Naruto's "relationship" was cute, and they had taken to following the pair around wherever they went together (which was everywhere).

Sasuke's life was over.

He was Naruto's boyfriend.

The only people in the entire village who weren't thrilled about Sasuke and his new significant other were Sakura, Ino, and Hinata. Sakura and Ino had never been expected to like the situation, but Hinata had taken to telling everyone she could that she had always secretly loved Naruto-kun; that she had liked him first and that "Sasuke Bastard" did not deserve him.

Sasuke had to admit, he couldn't have asked for a more affectionate dating partner. (Boyfriend was just too creepy a concept for him to accept.) Naruto was sweet, and always insisted on being by Sasuke's side, but that didn't mean that Sasuke wasn't repulsed by what had happened.

In one day, he'd managed to ruin his own life.

He sat at home on a particular night, waiting for Naruto to come over so they could go out. He was surprisingly convincing; he had to at least act as though he wanted Naruto. After all, it was he who had got the ball rolling in the first place.

Hearing the doorbell ring, he permitted himself one last good and long eye-roll before he answered it. He opened the door, his fake "I love you" smile plastered on his face. Naruto was dressed in a suit (heck, anything other than that stupid orange outfit was a nice change), and it made Sasuke feel inadequate. He felt as though he should have donned something fancy as well.

"Sasuke-kun..." Naruto whispered seductively as he threw himself into his lover's arms, biting his ear as he went. The usual.

"Not now..." Sasuke muttered, embarrassed. He hated doing these sexual things with Naruto, who was now trying to suffocate him with his lips.

"But, Sasuke... I thought tonight was going to be our special night."

Special night? That didn't ring any bells.

"What are you talking about, Naruto?"

"You know," Naruto said, managing another nip at Sasuke's earlobe. "Tonight we're going to have-"

"What!"

"Sex." Naruto finished his sentence with a playful come-and-get-me smirk.

"We are doing no such thing!"

"Why?" Naruto asked, turning on his annoyingly huge puppy eyes. "Don't you love me?"

"Y-yeah," Sasuke said, thinking hard for an explanation. "I just don't think... we're ready." He tried to summon a blush.

Naruto's demeanor changed instantly. He hugged Sasuke tightly around the shoulders. "That's so cute," he whispered. "But I think we are."

With that, he shoved Sasuke down onto the floor, lips making contact again. Sasuke was not only startled, he was now infuriated. To date Naruto was one thing, to be _raped _by him was another. He rammed his foot into Naruto's chest, sending the blonde flying across the room and into a wall. He leapt to his feet angrily, watching the kyuubi stagger to his.

"Geez, Sasuke..." Naruto said, all traces if his "boyfriend voice" gone. "I was only messing."

"What?" The snarl still hadn't left his voice.

"It was only a joke..."

"Huh?"

"All of it, man... Kakashi put me up to it."

Sasuke was dumbfounded. The fury began to penetrate his senses again.

"You made a fool of me this whole time?"

"Well, you're the one who kissed me, Sasuke."

Sasuke was angry, but he was also hurt. As much as he'd hated being with Naruto and living a lie, it had meant something to know that someone cared for him that way. He marched over to Naruto, pulled him up by the collar of his suit, and kissed him good and long.

An explanation was surely going to be needed.

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**One more chapter is on the way! Please stay tuned, I'll have it up as soon as possible, I promise!**

**There is Sasunaru is the very near future. I do have evil yaoi plans.**


	3. Chapter 3

**Disclaimer: I am not the owner of Naruto.**

**Sorry it's been so long since I updated, but I've been working on oneshots. Gomen. I wanted to update, and many of you have been begging me to. And so now I'm finally getting around to it, so I hope you guys like this.**

**Enjoy my evil yaoi plans!**

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"Sasuke?"

Naruto ran a finger over his lips, staring at the blushing raven-haired boy standing in front of him. Who, by the way, had just kissed him.

"Sasuke, I thought..."

"I _do_ love you, alright?" As soon as the words were out of his mouth, he wondered when that had come to be. He did love Naruto. But how? Why? Where had these feelings come from?

"Well, Sasuke, I just told you, it was all a-"

"No, no, I do love you!"

Naruto just stood there, watching as Sasuke broke down desperately.

"It _was_ all a fake!" he shouted through the tears welling in his charcoal eyes. "I wanted to act like I was gay, so I chose you!"

"Huh?"

"It was those damn girls that follow me around!" he said, his voice choked. "I wanted them to leave me the hell alone, so I kissed you to make them think I was gay!"

"So you... didn't love me?"

"No!" Sasuke fell to his knees and buried his face in his hands. "But I do now!"

He was sobbing at this point, his loud voice carrying throughout the room. Naruto walked carefully over to him.

"Look, Sasuke, I... I'm sorry. I was surprised when you kissed me that day at Ichiraku. But I... I didn't know what to do."

He patted Sasuke's head.

"It was a nice kiss." He added in an undertone.

Sasuke looked up, a smile on his face, and Naruto recognized it: that malicious look of triumph. He stepped away from Sasuke as though he'd been shocked.

Sasuke stood up, drying the remnant tears on his face, and folding his arms.

"I got you good, you stupid dobe."

"Teme!"

"It serves you right, tricking me like that."

Naruto brow creased, and he huffed. He strode to Sasuke and used the weight of his body to shove him down on the floor.

"Scared?" he said, his fancy tie dangling in Sasuke's face.

"No, just pissed. Now get off me."

"How about no?"

The two jumped when they heard a knock at the door.

"Naruto? You and Sasuke ready yet?"

"Kakashi?" Sasuke hissed from under Naruto. "What's he doing?"

"He... uh... he was coming to laugh at you." Naruto whispered. "He has a camera and everything ready to see your face when I tricked you."

Sasuke pinched Naruto's thigh, and the blonde became a dead weight on top of him as revenge. Sasuke squirmed under him, panting.

"Naruto? Are you busy?" A chuckle.

"Hey," Sasuke gasped. "Let's trick him. Let's make him think we're having sex."

He pulled off his shirt and unbuttoned his pants. He started pulling at Naruto's tie and vest until Naruto stood up.

"What?"

"Come on," Sasuke said, holding Naruto's tie between his fingers. "Let's trick him good."

They were being careful to keep their voices to barely more than a whisper. A grin broke out on Naruto's face, and he pulled off his own formal shirt and pants. He climbed back onto Sasuke.

"Boys? This is ridiculous. I'm breaking the door down..."

"Okay," Sasuke said. "Kiss me."

"What? I... I can't do that."

"We kissed just fine when we were dating!"

The door crashed to the floor and Sasuke grabbed Naruto forcefully, shoving his tongue down the blonde's throat. Naruto placed his hands on Sasuke's waist, and both starting making all the noise they could, with moans and whimpers aplenty.

Kakashi simply watched the two thrashing around on the floor, next to naked, the camera held up in front of them. And yes, the little red light was on.

"Got you both!" he announced. "I expect this'll make Konoha News, this will."

He paused long enough to get their horrified looks on tape, and left, booming with laughter.

"I'll be damned," Sasuke said, sitting up, rubbing his forehead and looking at the broken door. "That bastard."

"Now what?"

Sasuke looked over his shoulder at Naruto, lying flat on his back with his head up, staring over his chest.

"What do you mean?"

"Well, the whole town thinks us gay, so..."

"So...?"

"Why not?"

Sasuke turned completely around. He could see, in the receding sunlight, that Naruto was blushing, though his voice was cool and still. He looked back at the hallway through the space where his door had been.

"I guess I have time for a little fun, boyfriend," he said through a smile. "Whaddaya say?"

"I say, those girls are sure shit outta luck."

Sasuke crawled back to Naruto, touched his nose, and stood up.

The bed would be better."

"Of course." Naruto said, with a mocking spank on Sasuke's butt.

"Hey, leave my ass alone!"

"Why?" Naruto asked, shoving Sasuke down on the bed. "I'm about to own it."

**_OWARI_**

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**I hope that was a fitting end to the story you have all been reading and loving. It may not be completely to your expectations, but hey, I think I did alright. Ya know, I just couldn't live with myself if Sasuke and Naruto had went along with the tricks and not ended up together.**

**All the world needs is just a little more Sasunaru.**

**A little more yaoi, to be specific.**

**Cheers!**


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